How to Create a Healthy Relationship With Your Phone

By: Irina Vasilchenko, LCSW

A smartphone, tablet, or computer can be a very helpful tool in our everyday lives, with the smartphone being the most dominant portal of information and communication technology. Smartphones helped us to stay connected and created a new sense of normalcy during a global pandemic. However, while beneficial in numerous ways, smartphones have disadvantages such as reduction in work efficacy, personal attention, social interactions, and even psychological addiction. With increased telework and decreased social interaction, smartphone usage has become a problem in many people’s lives. When you spend more time on social media or playing games than you do interacting with real people, or you can’t stop yourself from repeatedly checking texts, emails, or catch yourself picking up your phone and check a message and then find yourself thirty minutes later still browsing in your phone, not knowing how you ended up here - it may be time to reassess your technology use and a good time to implement healthy boundaries with this powerful device.

Recent studies identified that increased use of smartphones negatively impact our mental health in multiple ways, such us increased levels of anxiety and depression, sleep issues and even declines in self-worth, as well as negatively affecting our romantic relationships, friendships, and family life.

Below are some helpful tips to assist with healthy boundaries:

Figure out how much time you’re currently spending on your phone.

Install a time-tracking app that will gather data on how much time per day you spend on your phone and how often you pick it up.

Turn off as many push notifications as possible.

An incredibly simple way to cut down on distractions is to turn off push notifications for as many apps as you can.

Take distracting apps off your home screen.

This can help with unconscious use of your cell phone, such as when you pick up a phone to check the weather report and then found yourself shifting between Instagram and Facebook. Keep the apps that you want to encourage yourself to use, like those for reading or learning in the front, but banish anything that you want to limit your time with to folders on your second page of apps.

* To go a step further, you could even delete certain apps entirely and use them through your smartphone’s web browser or desktop computer.

Kick your device out of bed

Create a charging station for your phone that you can’t reach from your bed. By using a regular alarm clock and charging your phone out of reach, you won’t be tempted to start your day by getting sucked into an avalanche of messages and updates.

Keep yourself on a schedule

Schedule your smart phone use by setting up an alarm clock to check emails and messages and put it away until the next alarm goes off.

Identify some specific things you’d like to do with your reclaimed time.

This step is very important as you’ll end up with more free time on your hands. Much of this time will be in small chunks, such as when you’re riding the elevator or waiting in line. This can be great time to take a deep breath and just do nothing (which can be a surprisingly relaxing and restorative). Also, decide how you want to fill longer periods of time and prepare your environment to make it more likely that you’ll stick to these intentions in order not to revert to old behaviors.

References:

Argentine, Cindy. “Winning Science: Are Cell Phones An Addiction?” Odyssey., Sept 2011, Vol. 20 Issue 7, p-23- 25, Web. 18 Jun 13.

Sehar, Shoukat. “Cell phone addiction and psychological and physiological health in adolescents” EXCLI Journal. 2019; 18: 47–50.

Price, Catherine. “9 Ways to Finally Stop Spending So Much Time on Your Phone” Time Magazine., February 8, 2018.